'I'm 32, am about to be a mum of four, and have moved back home'

We were just about to celebrate our first Christmas in our new home we had purchased that year. The kids had finally settled into a new daycare, a new preschool and we had enrolled into the local school for my eldest Noah.

We were far from family, deciding to move out to a larger more rural property up the coast of New South Wales, but we were finding a rhythm and the visits were frequent enough.

Nikolina is about to become a mum of four - and she's recently moved into her in-laws' house.

Fast forward to now… I'm currently writing this article in the living room of my in-laws house, where we are now living, awaiting the arrival of twins.

It'll be busy, and it'll be loud, but this family of eight are about to be a very tight knit group.

When my husband and I found out we were expecting twins, our first concern was how we were going to manage the juggle ourselves. There are so many things to think about logistically… who is doing drop offs, how long am I on maternity leave, how many days of daycare can we afford…

The added pressure of being away from our supportive family was a little confronting.

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My mum wasn't around the corner anymore where she could easily pop in and help to hold a crying baby (as I tend to the other). My mother-in-law was too far to pick up the eldest two from pre-school and bring them home so I don't have to lug the twins along with me.

These small but huge forms of help were now gone for us.

And so, despite finally feeling like grown ups in our big house with our big lawn with our big kids… my husband and I decided that life would have to wait. That right now, space and independence came second to help and support.

We were lucky enough to have my incredible in-laws offer to have us move in to help with the pregnancy, the chaos of birth and the proceeding 'newborn twins with two energetic toddlers running around' stage.

Though I admit, at first it felt like we couldn't possibly take up the offer. There will be four of us! And we are adults… we should be able to cope right?

But when we really thought about what was stopping us… it was really just an odd shame that came over us both whenever we wanted to admit that, actually, YES we do need and want the help. And YES, it would be a life saver having people around.

It would help us financially, and emotionally, and physically and logistically. Why were we so embarrassed to admit this? Why can't we all just accept help when it is offered to us?

We live in this world where everything is too expensive, but we have to be able to afford it. Everyone is working full time, but we have to be present and show up for our kids. Everyone is struggling to keep up, but can't accept any help because then it shows that we 'can't do it all'.

Why are we a generation of parents who care more about what it looks like we can handle, rather than what we can actually take on – solo and without assistance?

Well, I'm here to tell you option A sucks. And the option (if you have it) to say yes to help, say yes to company, say yes to a village is the much better one.

Take it, don't be embarrassed by it, and enjoy the benefits it comes with.

Oh, and ignore the Instagram spam trying to convince you to go back to option A… that reality is a lie.

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