I’d given up on love – then I met my wife on Instagram

Michael Baah married Kate at Seckford Hall in Suffolk, despite having sworn off tying the knot - Sophie Oldhamstead/Sophie Oldhamstead Photography

After a long-term relationship, it can be hard to think of dating seriously again. In 2015, I split up with my long-term partner and mother of my child after seven years together.

I vowed never to marry – it was too painful to think about after the break-up. So I dated, but casually, meeting women through dating apps, friends of friends, or just in everyday social settings for a couple of years.

My daughter Saffron was only four when we split and I was wary of bringing someone new into her life. I knew that if I met someone I could have another long-term relationship with, they’d have to be someone who loved family life, but who was also organised (because I’m not!), a go-getter, independent, career-driven, and who was into fitness as well.

At the same time, I focused on my career as a celebrity personal trainer, working with influencers, A-list television and film actors, footballers and doing pre- and post-show prep with several Love Island contestants. I was gaining a lot of followers on Instagram – around 50,000 – from viral workout videos I had made, and building my reputation in the fitness industry.

But I never expected that would lead to my meeting the woman of my dreams.

Instagram notifications

At the beginning of 2017, I started to get consistent notifications on Instagram of an account liking the fitness content I was posting.

It was an account with the username @showmeyourdirtyface (after the song Dirty Face by Example). I thought it was a fake account as there were lots of selfies of a beautiful brunette, and the name of the account just didn’t match the photos. Maybe it was one of my exes, trolling me?

But it just kept popping up in notifications. I told my best friend, Abigail Clarke, about it, and she told me I should just go on a date with her. “Why not?” she asked. “You need to put yourself out there.”

She took my phone and messaged the account, asking whether they wanted to have a chat on the phone. The next day, Kate, who owned the account, phoned me and we talked for hours.

After Michael had contacted Kate via Instagram, they hit it off immediately when they first spoke to each other on the phone - John Lawrence/Marquis Suffolk

Phone calls and texts over WhatsApp soon became in-person dates, with our first date just a few weeks after we’d been talking. She drove an hour from a seaside area, Mersea Island, to meet me in Hornchurch for a meal at a pub and drinks and dessert at Zizzi.

We talked and laughed endlessly, and had our first kiss on that date. She told me she was totally on board with my having a daughter – a huge relief.

We ticked each other’s boxes

Every time we saw each other, I discovered more of who she was and felt increasingly sure that this could be my person. I loved how maternal she was towards everyone, loving to be the one who takes care of her friends and family. She was organised, down to earth, and practical. She had her life mapped out with a fantastic career as a senior audit manager. Most importantly, she got on with Saffron, who would often go to Kate for a chat instead of me.

She ticked all my most important boxes, and I hers. She loved that I upheld the importance of family, was driven, entrepreneurial, and always tried to see the best in people.

Meeting her parents won me over. In a very in-depth interview – it felt like I was going for a job – they asked me at least 21 questions about why I was dating their daughter. They adored Kate and wanted only the best for her.

You see these memes about people marrying a person so they can marry into a family. In part, that was definitely true for me. I adored Kate’s family. I quickly felt I could turn up at her mum’s house without Kate to have a chat.

Michael says meeting Kate’s parents won him over, and he bonded very quickly with her mother - John Lawrence/Marquis Suffolk

She clearly loved them too, and had even moved back in with her mum while saving up to buy her own house.

For months, we went back and forth visiting each other every weekend, taking the relationship slowly, not rushing into anything more serious. But when the pandemic hit and the country went into lockdown, my landlord massively increased my rent, and when I told Kate’s mum, she suggested I move in with them.

We all lived together as one big, happy family throughout the pandemic. We got to know each other even better, very quickly.

All part of the family

In 2021, catching us totally by surprise, Kate found out she was pregnant. Now three and a half, our daughter, Winter, is one of the greatest joys of our lives. We had already spoken openly about how we both wanted children together, and how we would parent once we had them. So although we hadn’t planned to have her so early, once she was here, we were totally prepared.

With me having to work and travel a lot, we’ve depended heavily on the help of our family, who love taking care of Winter so we can both work and go on consistent date nights.

Kate’s family have also embraced Saffron, too, making her feel part of their family just as they have done with me.

Before meeting Kate, I was frequently contacted by brands offering me free trips due to my large number of Instagram followers and the clients I was associated with, but I declined them because I didn’t have anyone to go with.

Once Kate and I started dating, I said yes to everything I thought we’d enjoy together. Our favourite trips were to Shangri-La hotels in Paris and London and a Santorini Kastelli hotel in Greece. As a family, we’ve had the chance to appear in Disney adverts, and on the game show Family Fortunes (where we won £10,000!).

Michael and Kate appeared on the game show Family Fortunes, winning £10,000 in the process - ITV

Surprise proposal

Even though I had sworn off marriage, I surprised Kate in Dubai in December 2023 with a marriage proposal. I booked everything and told Kate to take a week off work, roping her friend in to help me make it a total surprise. Neither of us has had any reservations about being together forever. We know we’re each other’s person.

In September, we invited our closest friends and family to our black-tie wedding in a 16th-century Tudor manor house, Seckford Hall in Suffolk. The wedding was incredible, beyond anything we could have hoped for. It was touch and go with the rain in the morning, but as if by magic the skies cleared straight after the ceremony. It felt surreal because it had been pouring down non-stop the whole week before, and yet at the exact moment we needed it, we had blue skies. It felt like a sign that luck was on our side.

Seeing my daughters, Winter and Saffron, walk down the aisle completely floored me. By the time Kate appeared, already crying herself, I lost it too. She looked breathtaking.

Kate always says to imagine if we’d met 10 years ago, how different life could have been now. Together, we’ve been the happiest we’ve ever been, and achieved so much together in such a short space of time. I wonder what it would have been like if we’d met earlier.

Although I knew our love story was special, it didn’t register how unusual it was until I told a client about how we’d met. In a sea of 50,000 followers on Instagram, Kate caught my eye, instigating a conversation that ended up in a love story.

Saying “I do” to Kate was not just about that moment, it was the culmination of such a random, beautiful journey that had led us there.

As told to Lauren Crosby Medlicott

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